It's All In The Name

Names don't mean a whole lot in today's society.  Facebook allows us to change them.  You can pay to have it altered.  To find a parent that names their child based on the name's meaning would be the exception.  In fact, it's hard to tell who is related anymore because of this "insignificant name" society.  Why would Henry John Deutschendorf change his name to John Denver?  Is Ice Cube a person or a thing?  Who picked the name Tuesday Weld?  Was she born on that day?  I mean seriously,  "what's in a name?"

In Genesis 25 we find an account detailing the birth of twin brothers, Jacob and Esau.  The first was named solely after his physical appearance,  Esau.  If he were alive today, we would translate his name "hairy"  or probably "Harry" just for his sake.  The second twin grabbed hold of the first's heel, and would be called Jacob, meaning supplanter.  This deceitful connotation would foreshadow Jacob's future as a master manipulator.  Imagine growing up knowing your name pretty much implied "liar."  You can see how that would shape the personality and character of a child.  Studies show that the words spoken into the life of a child will develop and shape his mind and personality.

Esau was a hunter by trade,  and hard work yielded a great appetite.  Jacob, more of a momma's boy had prepared some pottage that must have smelled delicious to starving Esau.  Because he despised his birthright, he traded his future for a bowl of soup to Jacob...the supplanter. Fast-forward many years as Jacob's father Isaac (Israel) lies on his death bed.  As tradition would have it,  the first born would be blessed and receive his birthright.  Isaac requested his eldest hunt and prepare his signature dish before the ceremony would begin.  While out,  Jacob girds himself with hairy goatskin to feel and smell like Esau to his dim-eyed father.  His voice would betray him,  so Isaac asks the question that will shape Jacob's life:  What is you name?

As the scripture tells, Jacob lied (go figure)  and claimed his name to be Esau.  The events to follow would drive him from his home in fear. God has a way of "working all things together for good"  and begins to fulfill his promise to Jacob while serving his uncle Laban.  God instructs Jacob back to his hometown,  and an old fear arises...what about Esau?  Can you picture it?  Jacob alone seeing that figure approaching...was it Esau?  A stranger?  He raises his staff in defense as the wrestling match that would last till morning commences.  Jacob's thigh is injured,  but he still holds on.  "I won't let go until you bless me!"

When Jacob encounters deity,  he is asked in Genesis 32:27 "what is your name?"  Funny.  That's not the first time he's been asked this question, but it's also not the first time Jacob has asked for a blessing.  But now the hardships of life and some maturity have allowed Jacob to own his flawed identity.  Here he replies, "Jacob." Supplanter. Deceiver. Manipulator.  Upon this confession, God changes Jacob's name to Israel "God prevails."  He who once relied upon his own ability to supplant, may now rest in the prevailing power of God, with whom he is prince.

1.  Not every opponent is your adversary.  
We give Satan way more credit than he is due.  There will be times along your journey when God, himself will stand before your road of blessing.  The one who promised "no good thing will he withhold" wants to see just how much faith you actually have in the Promise Keeper.  A spiritual wrestling match may not be someone trying to steal your blessing; it could be God trying to prove your belief.  Don't let go!

2. A wrestle with God will forever affect your walk. 
Sorry Staples, but not every problem has a "That Was Easy" button.  The reason many Christians will never receive what God has for them is because they are not willing to wrestle through then night for it.  Right when the fight gets hard, we spiritualize a loss by saying "I guess God doesn't want me to have this."  It's more likely God wants to know if you're desperate enough to cling tightly to him.  When you do,  you'll find the morning breaking, the night dissipating, and your walk forever changed.  This battle scar won't allow your victory to be forgotten.  The wound that you can showcase as a trophy of God's grace.  The permanent weakness where your faith must fall on the God who prevails.

3.  The I Am must change who you think you are. 
Remember back when Jacob pretended to be someone else in order to come out on top?  How did that work out for him?  We find insecurities, fears, and doubt at war within us, fighting who God has created us to be.  We live a lie, deceiving all around us for a time, but the truth always comes out.  Face to face with Jesus, we are forced to admit who we really are.  But blessings are not contingent upon who I have become, but upon who He is.  Recognition of my wretchedness allows God to rename me and remake me. The I Am can make me into more than I could ever pretend to be.  Jacob stepped into the battle believing his greatest need was to escape those he had deceived.  He left the battle realizing his great need for faith in the promises of God.  Fear of man shifts to fear of God.

7 Things Your Pastor's Kid Needs From You

1. People Not Parents 

 People function simultaneously as one of the greatest advantages and disadvantages to the ministry. Without them, there is no ministry. With them, there will always be problems. Growing up in a ministry home provides for connecting with new people, and lots of them, almost weekly. Often because of their parent’s vocation, PK’s are held to a higher standard. People expect them to perform at a certain level, not even expected of their own children. And when the Pastor’s kid slips, there is always a committee waiting to let them know. Dear church member, your PK has a set of parents who do not need your help. Your PK needs to know that you are a person just like anyone else, and not their parent.

 2. Investment Not Interrogation 

 While there are some pastors who excel at balancing church and home life, many struggle with discipling their own kids while discipling all the other church leaders. What if you decided to invest a little time into your pastor’s kid just for their benefit and personal growth? The PK will be leery at first, because the typical church member only gives when they expect something in return. If the only time you talk to your pastor’s kid is when you want information, or you want to fast track something to the pastor’s ear, it’s better you not talk to them at all.

 3. Flexibility To Function 

 You know how your kids sometimes miss that youth group activity because of a sports game, or other exciting opportunity? Yeah, your Pastor’s kid would like to be afforded that same flexibility. While PK’s do love the ministry, they would like to have friends and fun outside of church too. Yes, even PK’s can have hobbies.

 4. Security In What You Say

 For most people, after they clock out at 5pm, they wouldn’t dare answer a phone call for a work related issue. But those same people expect the pastor to pick up at 9pm while he is enjoying a movie and time with his family. I remember at 12 years old being almost to the resort where we would vacation and getting the “my wife is in the hospital call” where we then turned around to head back home. Unfortunately, living on call is a vocational hazard for pastors. They cannot always live up to what they promise their kids. If not carefully handled, PK’s can become cynical creatures who analyze promises. So if you throw a guarantee the way of your pastor’s kids, don’t take it lightly. They don’t.

 5. Your Attention and Intrigue 

PK”s become experts at the 10AM handshaking small talk game. They expect that people will ask shallow questions and return shallow answers. Then, when dad gets home from a day filled with counseling, he’s probably used his words up and isn’t looking to talk a whole lot more. So if your pastor’s kid happens to be sharing something with you, pause and give them your undivided attention. To them this information is important, and you are the first friend they’ve found to share it with.

 6. Consistency, Not Double Standards 

 We have touched on this slightly; and while the name says it all, it is good that we expound here. The life of a PK is that of a fishbowl. There are people in your church who believe it is their job to legislate righteousness into the life of your pastor’s family. Don’t believe me? Ask. - If what your pastor preaches is good enough for his kids, it is good enough for yours. And if you aren’t going to expect a certain level of responsibility from your children (or yourself) don’t expect it from them either.

 7. Freedom to Fail 

 PK’s are human, and therefore prone to sin. I know that preacher’s families are supposed to always smile, act right, read their Bible recreationally for hours each day, and always speak in church words. But since that would require an insane amount of hypocrisy, just give your PK some freedom to fail. When they fall, help them back up without a lecture. This freedom will enable them to live openly around you, and ultimately minister more effectively.